It’s Friday, May 6th, 2016…but before we begin, in recognition of the frequency with which we reproduce their work, we take a moment, courtesy of Hope ‘n Change, to honor those whose time and talent help make this blog possible:

Now, here’s our Republican post mortem edition of The Gouge!

First up, though we’ve provided the visuals of Trump’s lowest blows, courtesy of his Morning Jolt, Jim Geraghty lists…

Seven Key Surprises That Led Us to This Point

 

You may come up with your own list, but I can think of seven key moments in this past year where something unexpected happened, and Donald Trump ended up benefiting from that turn of events. 1. How likely was it that 17 Republicans would choose to run for president, creating such a logjam that they couldn’t all appear on stage at the same time? This mass delusion among long-forgotten and long-shot Republicans meant that a rising governor like Bobby Jindal would never appear on a debate stage in prime time, because the networks chose national poll standing as the criteria to appear in the 8 p.m. hour. How likely was it that experienced, accomplished conservative Republicans like Rick Perry, Scott Walker and Jindal would end up being sidelined early, while relics like George Pataki and Jim Gilmore, and retreads like Rick Santorum and Mike Huckabee hung around month after month? The cattle call created an early dynamic of Trump against the crowd; the guy known for reality television, who began the race throwing down the gauntlet by charging that Mexico was sending rapists into the United States, versus a baseball team’s worth of governors, senators and retired governors and senators, all offering more or less the traditional GOP rhetoric. 2. For at least a decade, a slew of prominent conservative voices warned their audiences about “RINOs” and sellouts and liberal candidates who only posed as conservatives when needing votes in a primary. How likely was it that these figures, who appeared to prize conservative principles and strong records for years, would suddenly welcome Trump, a longtime Democratic donor who had supported gun control, abortion on demand, higher taxes, TARP, the auto bailout, and described himself as “very liberal when it comes to healthcare”? How likely was it that Rush Limbaugh, Sean Hannity, Laura Ingraham, Ann Coulter, Sarah Palin, and Matt Drudge would not merely tolerate Trump’s previous liberal views but excuse them or conclude they were irrelevant to the 2016 discussion? How likely was it that they would look at Trump’s recent declarations that he’s pro-life and pro-gun and they would believe him? The most common defense of Trump was that he, alone, was willing to take on the issue of illegal immigration in the bold, direct way so many Americans wanted. But these same people who declared the supremacy of this issue never seemed bothered by Trump’s past hiring of illegal immigrants, his extensive use of foreign workers, his flip-flopping on H-1B visas, and the “touchback amnesty” aspect of his plan, where illegal immigrants could apply for citizenship after they returned to their own country. If illegal immigration was such a defining issue, why did so few Trump voters want to explore these parts of Trump’s record and plan? 3. Trump’s friends in conservative media embraced him and refused to let go, even when it was clear many other conservatives found him repulsive on an ideological and character level, and when Trump did things that would embarrass any right-thinking person. Mark Levin stopped giving Trump the benefit of the doubt after the mogul started arguing that Ted Cruz was a Canadian ineligible for the presidency. How likely was it that Trump’s friendly voices would stand steadfast and simply ignore Trump’s more ridiculous arguments, such as that the guy who rushed the stage was ISIS, that Justice Scalia was murdered, that he knew a two-year-old who instantly developed autism from a vaccine, that if elected he would “find out who really knocked down the World Trade Center,” the tweet about Heidi Cruz, or Tuesday’s accusation that Cruz’s father consorted with Lee Harvey Oswald? 4. How likely was it that the rest of the Republican field would be so focused upon attacking on each other and spend such little time and resources attacking the front-runner? Who would have figured Jeb Bush’s super PAC would choose to spend about $20 million trashing his former protégé, Marco Rubio, instead of Trump? 5. For a long time, the hope of the anti-Trump forces was that he only represented a large plurality in the party, not a majority. It was fairly clear after South Carolina that John Kasich was a niche candidate, the Republican for those who don’t like Republicans, and that he had little chance of winning outside of his home state. Yet he continued, in state after state, finishing in the low single digits, ensuring there was never a two-man race. Maybe if Kasich had dropped out earlier, Trump still would have won — but we’ll never know, because the Ohio governor was always there to split the non-Trump vote. 6. How likely was it that the last indisputable conservative standing would be the one who had made so many enemies throughout the Republican Party? On paper, a choice between Trump and Cruz should have been a no-brainer for every Republican official. Even Cruz’s enemies thought he was smart; Trump proved himself stunningly ill-prepared and uninterested in learning more. Cruz was indisputably conservative; Trump’s positions depend on who’s asking the questions. Cruz had fought hard fights in the courtroom and in the Senate and had the scars to prove it; Trump spent the past decade hosting a reality show. Cruz polls better than Trump when matched against Hillary. Cruz never said nice things about Vladimir Putin. But ultimately, when it came down to Trump and Cruz, most of Cruz’s colleagues sat on their hands. Clearly, many GOP members of Congress loathe him, either for his efforts during the government shutdown or for what they see as a selfish, grandstanding, condescending personality. This dynamic makes both Cruz and his colleagues look bad. Ted Cruz had the worst awareness of his own standing with his colleagues since Jon Snow managed the Night Watch. A common reality-show contestant slogan is, “I’m not here to make friends.” Well, sometimes you should try. A lot of politics is about coalition-building, and every leader needs allies. People are less inclined to follow you if they don’t trust you and like you. You’re in this together; you might as well try to minimize antagonism, and that includes all I’m-the-only-man-in-Washington-you-can-trust poses. But Cruz’s congressional colleagues look petty by putting past disputes and personal pique first at this moment when the stakes are so high. Unless congressional Republicans are as shamelessly opportunistic and ideologically flexible as Trump — not as unlikely as it once seemed — they should see a Cruz presidency as more productive and better than a Trump one. Yet they’re more willing to roll the dice on Trump — and seemingly more comfortable with the prospect of a Hillary Clinton presidency than a Cruz one. 7. Those of us who don’t like Trump did our part; we voted for somebody else. But ultimately, we couldn’t unite around one alternative. The good news for the #NeverTrump movement is that entering Indiana, 16 million Republicans wanted someone besides Trump. The bad news is, they were split among candidates — mostly Cruz, Rubio, and Kasich — and 10 million Republicans wanted Trump.

Regular readers know we’re no fan of The Donald; but he’s right about one thing:

And, as much as we hate to admit it, like her prior support for H. Ross Perot, TLJ proves his point.

Then again, the Dimocratic base, if not as gullible, is certainly far, far more blindly partisan in their support, as evidenced by the party’s current front-waddler:

Res ipsa loquitur, baby; res ipsa loquitur!

In a related item from the editors at NRO:

Trump, Alack

 

How on earth did it EVER come to this?!?

For months, Donald Trump has complained that he should not have to win a majority of delegates to the Republican convention to be the party’s nominee. We were among those who insisted to the contrary — that he had to win a majority and otherwise abide by the procedures the party had set forth in advance of the nomination contest. Now that he has won the Indiana primary and Senator Cruz and Governor Kasich have dropped out of the race, he is guaranteed to do that: to win fair and square, without the threat of violence in Cleveland that he had previously and shamefully raised.

His victory demonstrated some real strengths that it would be foolish to deny. His mastery of the media was one, and we do not make that observation backhandedly: Would that a conservative of good character had displayed such an ability to use the networks to convey his messages. Trump had a better sense of where Republican voters are on immigration than most of the other candidates (even if he has taken no interest in the crucial details). His campaign has also shown boldness and imagination. Who else would have tried to win while spending almost no money? Who else would have ignored the strategists and consultants and just winged it, day after day, and successfully too?

There ends our praise. We regret (“Regret” is far too polite a term!) that Trump will be the Republican nominee and think Senator Cruz, our preferred candidate, would have been vastly better. (Another understatement!) Trump has done little to demonstrate any commitment to, or even understanding of, conservative principles; his instinct seems to be to use government power to silence his critics; he has no experience in government, a lack that we persist in seeing as a bad thing; his ethical record is disturbing; he will simply make things up when it suits his purposes; he traffics in conspiracy theories about everything from Iraq to the JFK assassination; he exhibits little self-control. We assume that in coming days we will hear even more discussion than previously of a new, more “presidential” Trump in the offing. We’ll believe it when we see it sustained.

Trump has won more primary votes than any nominee before him; but it is also true that no nominee has seen more primary votes cast for his opponents. He eked out a bare majority in Indiana at a time when past nominees were winning supermajorities. Any other nominee in this weak position would now turn to unifying his party. But Trump has in recent days said that he can win without doing that. If he finds a way to win the general election without nearly uniform support from Republicans, he will again have broken the mold of modern politics. He enters the race as an underdog against Hillary Clinton, who is, thanks entirely to him and notwithstanding her own primary defeat in the state, the other great victor in Indiana.

As Eliana Johnson noted in her requiem for the Cruz campaign:

“At a press conference on Tuesday morning, his final day on the campaign trail, Cruz let loose on Trump, calling him a “serial philanderer” and a “pathological liar” and concluding, “Morality doesn’t exist for him.”  But the Republican establishment and the party’s voters knew that, and they chose Trump over Cruz anyway.“

Meanwhile, back at the ranch, the current jefe of The Gang Whose Aim Is Worse Than Ever tells it like it is, at least from where we’re currently sitting:

In other words, Donald, you start acting presidential, and we’ll reconsider supporting you; not just voting for you, supporting you!

Then there’s this, also courtesy of NRO, from Myra Adams regarding the front runner for 2nd fiddle to the presumptive nominee:

A Trump-Gingrich Ticket: Brilliant or Crazy?

 

Birds of a philandering feather flocking together!

“Over the last three months, Trump watchers have noticed that former House speaker and 2012 Republican presidential candidate Newt Gingrich has been consistently advocating on Trump’s behalf in the media, on Capitol Hill, among K Street power brokers, and on social media. In fact, Gingrich has morphed into Trump’s unofficial ambassador for GOP peace and unity, while also seeking converts in hostile territory.

Gingrich is the most recognized and respected member of the GOP establishment who is defending the insurgent candidate — even as Trump rails against that same establishment. But now, it has become apparent that Gingrich is waging an active campaign to become Donald Trump’s running mate.

Validating those efforts, Gingrich’s name recently appeared in the pages of the New York Times on a list of “Who Might (or Might Not) Be Donald Trump’s Running Mate if He’s the Nominee.” Which leads one to ask: Could a Trump-Gingrich ticket be a brilliant game-changing winner, or would Gingrich be buying a first-class ticket on the Trump Titanic?

These days, any Trump World speculation is incomplete without comments from Roger Stone — Trump’s high-profile, long-time, on-again-off-again unofficial consigliere who was called “Donald Trump’s Donald Trump” in a recent Politico interview. When I asked Stone about a Trump-Gingrich ticket he said, “Newt has been enormously helpful defending Trump against the establishment” and that he “should be on Trump’s short list.” Most tellingly, Stone told me that “Newt is a revolutionary, and Trump is leading a revolution.”

Curious about Gingrich’s reaction to Stone’s “revolution” comment and to his name being mentioned on the Times’ VP list, I reached out to the former Speaker. This is what he said:

It is an honor to be mentioned. We need a new Contract with America to outline a 100-day plan to take back Washington from the lobbyists, bureaucrats, unions, and leftists. After helping in 1980 with Reagan and 1995 as speaker I know we have to move boldly and decisively before the election results wear off and the establishment starts fighting us. That is my focus.

His answer speaks volumes. In the Times article Gingrich is quoted as saying that “it would be very hard for a patriotic citizen to say no” and that “very few people pass up the chance to be a heartbeat away from the presidency.” I think it’s safe to say that Newt is actively developing a new Contract while awaiting Trump’s call…”

Holy philanderers-of-the-world-unite, Batman; talk about the egos have landed!  All these two serial adulterers need is Rush Limbaugh as Press Secretary and they’d be the trifecta of marital infidelity!

We’re far from certain the thrice-married Gingrich is the best salesman for anything involving the honoring of promises…or vows.  Sure he’s bright and well-informed; but so are any number of other people, including Ted Cruz’s short-lived running mate, the woman Trump so disrespectfully disparaged.

And since we’re on the subject of broken promises, it’s been all of what, three days since Trump effectively clinched the nomination, and we’re already able to present Flip-Flop #1:

Donald Trump Won’t Self-Fund General-Election Campaign

Presumptive Republican nominee plans to create ‘world-class finance organization’ to back campaign

 

“Donald Trump won’t self-fund his general-election campaign, and will instead create a “world-class finance organization,” the presumptive Republican nominee said in an interview on Wednesday.

For a campaign expected to cost more than $1 billion, “I’ll be putting up money, but won’t be completely self-funding, as I did during the primaries,” Mr. Trump said on Wednesday. The New York businessman, who did receive some mostly small unsolicited donations, lent his campaign $36 million of the $47 million he spent through March.

That plan represents a shift for Mr. Trump (That’s putting it mildly!), who has for months portrayed his Republican opponents as “puppets” for relying on super PACs and taking contributions from wealthy donors that he said came with strings attached…”

As we pointed out some time back, and has been noted by any number of other sources, Trump is nowhere rich enough, nor willing to risk what wealth he has, to self-finance his campaign.  Hells bells; Jack Kent Cooke may have been as slimy a human being as The Donald, but at least he had the commitment to spend his own money when he built a new home for the Redskins.

Then there’s Flip-Flop #2:

Sounds rather like a bedrock, core belief to us.  But that was then; as Brandon Morse notes at RedState.com, this is now:

“Different Kind of Republican” Trump Is Now Open To Raising the Minimum Wage

 

“…Brace yourselves, folks. While I doubt it will hurt his chances with Republicans at all now, Trump is free and clear to begin pandering to whomever he needs to now that Ted Cruz is out of the picture. I more than expect to see him reverse, and soften on a good number of positions.

If the Republicans who voted for him don’t start feeling a little buyers remorse within the next couple of months, I’ll be…never mind. Nothing surprises me anymore.“

Well Trumpeteers, you can’t say…

…he didn’t warn you.  But who cares as long as…

…he keeps spouting his meaningless bullsh*t, right?!?

Meanwhile, Hillary’s already offered a preview of the second theme with which she’ll pound Trump through November:

Clinton: America can’t take a chance on ‘loose cannon’ Trump

 

“I don’t think we can take a risk on a loose cannon like Donald Trump running our country,” she told CNN’s Anderson Cooper in an exclusive interview. “I do think he is a loose cannon, and loose cannons tend to misfire.”

Though frankly, asserting Trump’s a security risk is sheer chutzpah coming from the…

Turning now to to our With Friends Like These, Who Needs Dimocrats?!? segment, as FOX News reports…

Georgia governor vetoes ‘campus-carry’ concealed gun bill

 

“Georgia’s Republican governor vetoed a bill Tuesday allowing concealed handguns on college campuses, rejecting the proposal that a legislature controlled by his own party had easily approved in an election year. The bill would have allowed anyone 21 and over to carry a concealed handgun with the proper permit on a public college or university campus.

…“From the early days of our nation and state, colleges have been treated as sanctuaries of learning where firearms have not been allowed,” Deal said. “To depart from such time honored protections should require overwhelming justification. I do not find that such justification exists.”…”

Homicidal psychopaths and jihadists throughout the country…

…couldn’t agree more, already having conclusively established supposed “gun-free zones” as their happiest hunting grounds.  And this idiot’s on OUR side?!?  Any question the good governor enjoys the protection of an armed security escort?

So while law-abiding citizens will be hamstrung, at least legally, the likes of Adam Lanza, Nidal Hasan, Seung-Hui Cho, Tashfeen Malik and Syed Rizwan Farook, Jarod Loughner, Dylann Roof, James Eagan Holmes and Chris Mercer will remain free to ply their homicidal trade without fear of interference from anyone able to defend themselves and others.  This isn’t simple ignorance, it’s the very embodiment of Einstein’s definition of insanity.

And in today’s edition of Tales From the Darkside, the WSJ‘s Jason Riley reveals why…

I Was Disinvited on Campus

The anti-free speech takeover is so complete that now the fear of stirring a protest can determine what ideas students will hear.

 

“‘Progressives rule higher education,” write political scientists Jon Shields and Joshua Dunn Sr. in “Passing on the Right,” a new book on the dearth of conservative professors. “Their rule is not absolute. But conservatives are scarcer in academia than in just about any other major profession.”

Profs. Shields and Dunn aren’t exaggerating. In the humanities and social sciences, they note, surveys show that the percentage of self-described Marxist professors is around 18%, or nearly double that of self-described Republicans.

Nor is it merely classroom instruction that leftists tend to control. Liberal faculty and college administrators also closely monitor outside speakers invited to campus. The message conveyed to students is that people who challenge liberal dogma are not very welcome. A 2010 report by the Association of American Colleges and Universities found that only 40% of college freshman “strongly agreed that it is safe to hold unpopular positions on campus” and that by senior year it’s down to 30%.

…Last month I was invited by a professor to speak at Virginia Tech in the fall. Last week, the same professor reluctantly rescinded the invitation, citing concerns from his department head and other faculty members that my writings on race in The Wall Street Journal would spark protests. Profiles in campus courage.

…In April, I spoke at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill, where the college Republicans who invited me took the precaution of clearing my name with liberal student groups “to make sure they wouldn’t be upset.”

We’ve reached a point where conservatives must have their campus speakers preapproved by left-wing pressure groups. If progressives aren’t already in absolute control of academia, they’re pretty close.“

As the video accompanying our Quote of the Day confirms, neither modern Academia nor the vacuous victims of their concerted campus disinformation campaigns have any appreciation whatsoever for the basic underpinnings of the Constitution as enumerated in the Bill of Rights.  Perhaps if the Founding Fathers had used the phrase “Bill of Lefts”?!?

Which brings us to The Lighter Side…

Then there’s this bit of humor indicative of the thoroughness with which The Obamao’s Administration screens Muslims they’re relocating to America:

Finally, we’ll call it a week with another titillating tale torn from the pages of The Crime Blotter:

Woman Reports Finding Semen in KFC Chicken Sandwiches

 

A woman last week contacted Florida cops to report that she believed a pair of chicken sandwiches purchased at KFC “contained semen,”according to a police report.

…No arrests have been made in connection with the alleged food adulteration, which is “still under investigation,” according to a sheriff’s spokesperson. The brief police report, which characterizes the matter as “suspicious incidents,” does not indicate whether the woman consumed any of the food.

This story is so bogus in soooo many ways!  First, like it couldn’t have been mayo?!?  Second, could she have not perhaps confused KFC with McDonald’s and ordered her sandwiches with “special sauce”?!?

But seriously, if she didn’t eat it, how did she know it was there; and if she did, how did she know what it was?!?  Inquiring minds want to know; okay,…honestly, we don’t!

Enjoy your Mother’s Day weekend; and if your mom’s still extent, unlike our dear, departed Tickie…

…enjoy, indeed, cherish every moment!

Magoo